Home Improvement

I have been a very handy girl lately. These things come with the territory when one moves into a new house. There are a zillion little projects. Most of them are nagging little things that are easy to ignore once the place is really home and you've left your mark. We're not there yet. These things are not so easy for me to ignore -- though I think Buster could care less. He's not as picky as I am.

Some wives make a honey-do list then wait patiently or nag until their husbands take care of it. That's definitely not my style. I'm proud of being a handy girl and I don't like waiting or nagging. Besides, if I do it it'll be done my way, and I like that. Don't worry, Buster has plenty of his own projects.

I started my extra long to-do list a week or so ago and took most of the day off work today to tackle a few more of these little buggers.

The thermostat was digital, but not programmable so I installed this one last week:


To be honest, it was a lot easier to install than to program. Might have to replace it with something a little less obtuse sometime in the not too distant future.

The bedroom windows were all covered by nasty old roller shades, some of which were not exactly functional. Yesterday I started hanging curtains in the master bedroom. I still have to do the two smaller windows, but the big window is all done:

No, we don't have astro-turf for bedroom carpet, but it is the same color. That's on the list of big money projects. We're not ready to tackle those yet, sadly.

Today I started in my office. The dimmer switch no longer dimmed, it just turned the light on and off. I replaced it. Now I can have the right amount of light for any occasion, and the switch looks much nicer, too.


Moving on to the livingroom, this dimmer switch worked, but it was.. well.. backwards:

When I turned the dial it would click on to the brightest setting then dim as I kept turning. I know plenty of people wouldn't think twice about this but I found it really irritating. So I replaced it. Turns out that the installed dimmer was actually meant to be a fan control, not a light control. Maybe that explains the backwards operation.

This was the only project that gave me any trouble. You see, I've been stubborn and I refused to turn off the electricity to do any of the electrical work. The breakers aren't properly labeled and it's always an adventure (rebooting computers and resetting clocks) when I need to turn off a breaker. Anyhow, as I was hooking up the new switch, it bit me. It was just a little jolt to the thumb and I'm not really sure how it happened because I don't think I was even touching anything with that thumb! No harm done and I managed to finish hooking up the switch without any more zaps. It works like a champ.

In case you might think I learned a lesson from that project, I moved right on to my smoke alarm project without even thinking about flipping breakers.

The old smoke alarm seemed non-functional. I wasn't going to test it with actual smoke, but the test button didn't work. That was making me a bit nervous.

I've never had a smoke alarm that was wired into the house electricity before. Regular battery powered smoke alarms are super easy to replace but I wasn't sure about the wired kind. No problem. Turned out to be a piece of cake. No zaps this time and the new smoke alarm nearly deafened me when I hit the test button:

It's also got a "it's not a real fire, I'm just cooking" button. I need one of those.

Next up, the blinds in the bathroom.


Those are standard aluminum blinds, but that is not a standard bathroom window. It comes down a lot lower than bathroom windows should. There is no way to open those blinds without completely sacrificing all modesty. So I replaced them with a top down pleated shade.


Now we can enjoy natural light in the bathroom without sitting naked in front of our neighbors. And, the new shade is very pretty. You probably can't see it in the photo, but it's got a very nice little leaf pattern. I like this shade so much that I'm thinking about ordering more for windows in the livingroom and guestroom.

Tomorrow I have the day off work (it's my birthday) so I'll work on the rest of my list. I still need to

• Hang a top down shade in the other bathroom
• Hang the rest of the bedroom curtains
• Put up a second smoke alarm (no wiring for this one)
• Put up a CO alarm in the basement (furnace 10+ years old? Get a CO alarm.)
  
• fix a bathroom faucet (ooh! plumbing! this should be fun.)
  
• Install some GFIs (none of the bathroom or kitchen outlets are GFIs -- maybe I oughtta find the right breakers before I tackle this one...)
  

And that's just the stuff I already have parts for. If I can get all those things done I might go buy some paint -- that's when the real fun starts!

P.S. Sorry for the dark photos. I used my new iPhone (Thanks, Mom and Dad, this thing rocks!). As soon as I remember where I put away the cable for my real camera I'll start using a flash indoors again.

A New Home

Departing from politics for a bit....

We're all moved into our new house.


Sorry, it was pretty cloudy when I took that picture so it looks a wee bit ominous. I promise, the house is not quite so imposing. It's warm and welcoming and bright and I like it very much. I especially like it now that I've gotten most of our stuff out of boxes...

Most. Not all.


Too many books. Not enough shelves. I need to fix that. Also on the list of things to fix:

• My office has no doors (once a dining room, then a den, now my office).
• Our dishwasher, garage door openers, and window shades are all so old I think Cleopatra may have been the original owner.
• Our cooktop is electric (EWWW! the horror!!).
• The bathrooms are painted in flat white (flat paint in a bathroom = dirty walls).

We still own the old house and until that's sold, we don't have the extra cash to do too much on our to do list. We've had a fair number of showings and we're reasonably optimistic that it will sell, perhaps early next year, sooner if we're lucky.

In the mean time, winter has arrived.


The first snow of the year is clinging to the grass in our back yard. With a heavy heart I declare the end of my 2008 road biking season. I'm going to get my mountain bike tuned up and see if I can't find warm enough clothes to spend some time exploring the many dirt roads near my house this winter. I'm also planning to spend lots of time at the gym. I want to start the 2009 road biking season strong!

Conservative Fundamentals

Thank goodness, the election is over. For the first time ever the American people have elected a racial minority to the highest office in the country. That's very exciting! He happens to have been the most liberal Congressman in the Senate. That's not so exciting. I hope the conservative media are wrong about Obama. I hope he turns out to be more moderate than expected. I hope he's able to unite the country and keep taxes reasonable and improve our foreign relations and do many of the other things he's promised.

I have many fears and hopes for the next two years while the Democrats rule the roost, but that's not what I want to talk about today. I want to talk about the Republicans, a party that, with a good deal of personal and ideological compromise, I've recently embraced. I want to talk about the future of conservatism and my hopes and fears on that front.

Jed Babbin wrote:

Cong. Paul Ryan (R-Wisc) got it right last night. He said the Republicans need a housecleaning. They need to reclaim the title of the “party of big ideas.” Those ideas have to be conservative ideas: smaller government, strong defense, and individual freedom.

This is a popular notion among conservatives right now. Get back to fundamentals. Get back to conservative idealism and reform: Small government, strong defense, individual freedom, and a strong commitment to the Constitution. Boy, does that ever sound good! A small government that allows capitalistic free markets to function with little or no interference. A government that provides for the defense of it's citizens and defends individual freedoms. A government that focuses on staying small so taxes can stay low across the board. A government that seeks to reduce it's responsibilities rather than grow it's power. A government that seeks to abide by both the letter and the spirit of the Constitution. It warms my libertarian-leaning heart.

The problem with the Republican party arrives in the baggage. In recent conservative ideology, individual freedom doesn't appear to include the freedom to marry someone of the same gender. Nor does it include a woman's reproductive freedom. The Constitutional tradition of separation of Church and State doesn't seem to stop the far right from endorsing the ridiculous notion that the public schools should teach creationism. This is all baggage that the Christian Coalition dropped on the Republican Party. These three ideas in particular don't fit on a true conservative agenda.

For some reason a vast majority of conservatives have jumped on the anti-gay marriage band wagon. Not one single person has given me a good solid reason why we should disallow two people from marrying no matter their genders. People argue that a marriage should be about the potential to have children. If that's so, then why are infertile people allowed to marry? Or women past menopause? Technology and adoption allow same sex couples to have children just as they allow infertile hetero couples to have children. Others argue that the traditional family (man, woman, children) is the backbone of society. To that I say look at the rising divorce rate, look at all the single parent homes. Divorce is causing a lot more damage to the traditional family than gay marriage! Would it be right to ban divorce to protect the institution of marriage? I don't understand how people can oppose gay marriage for any reason other than pure bigotry. This is in direct opposition to the notion of personal freedoms.

Abortion is a tough issue and I don't believe that either party has it figured out. The folks on the far left want it flat out legal even when the baby is already half born. The folks on the far right want every abortion banned even when the mother's life is at risk and the baby has little chance for a meaningful life. Both sides take it too far. Either way I personally think decisions about abortions should be left to individuals and their doctors. Until we can objectively determine at what point a fetus becomes an individual human being, any legal restrictions on abortions should come at a state or municipal level where local custom and the local moral majority can decide for themselves. If we really want to minimize government and maximize personal freedoms, such questions should not be handled at a federal level.

The ridiculous notion of creationism is just that: ridiculous. How any right thinking intelligent person could embrace such an idea is beyond my comprehension. How anyone could want such bull-hockey taught to impressionable children is again beyond my ability to comprehend. In any case, the first amendment to the Constitution guarantees your right to practice whatever religion you like. There's a tradition of separation of Church and State in this country (contrary to popular belief, the separation of Church and State is NOT part of the constitution, but a concept adopted to help uphold the first amendment). Creationism is a religious concept, NOT a scientific one. If you wish to teach your children creationism, you are free to do so, just don't ask the public school to do so.

When faced with these issues I'm embarrassed to call myself a conservative. On nearly any other topic I'm likely to agree with the conservative point of view. Smaller government, strong defense, individual freedoms, free market economics, flatter taxes, fewer social programs, patriotism, tradition, and strong adherence to the Constitution, these are conservative notions I can get behind. If the Republican party is going to make a fresh start perhaps it should shed the anti-gay pro-life creationist ideologies. Such ideas are contrary to the most fundamental of conservative ideals. I'm all for getting back to the fundamentals.

As far as President-elect Obama goes, I'm planning to give him the benefit of the doubt across the board. I will set aside my concerns about his past and judge him based on his actions from this day forward. A clean slate and a fresh start. I hope that we can look back in 20 years and remember our first black president with pride and honor.

Journalism, Politics, and Sci-Fi

We're moving this weekend to that new house I mentioned a while back so I really don't have time for a nice long well thought out piece here. But a friend of mine sent me this article: Would the last Honest Reporter Please Turn on the Lights by Orson Scott Card and I wish I could read it aloud to the whole country. Everyone should hear this message. It's a call for a return to journalistic integrity and honesty. Card discusses the reporting of the mortgage crisis and the current presidential campaign and shows how very biased the media has been. He seems to be specifically directing his message to newspaper reporters but I believe the mainstream television media is even more guilty. It's important to note that Orson Scott Card is a Democrat. He's also an award winning sci-fi/fantasy author, loved by his fans and respected by his peers, a majority of whom are also Democrats.

These two paragraphs from Card's article really struck home for me:

If you had any personal honor, each reporter and editor would be insisting on telling the truth — even if it hurts the election chances of your favorite candidate.

Because that's what honorable people do. Honest people tell the truth even when they don't like the probable consequences. That's what honesty means . That's how trust is earned.

How can we, the consumers of the media, hope to learn what's really happening in the world? How can we hope to make a well informed decision at the polls when our media, our supposed watchdogs, have taken it upon themselves to make our decisions for us? We should be outraged.

The best we can do is watch Fox News in equal doses with MSNBC and CNN, read humanevents.com to balance out what we read at nytimes.com and washingtonpost.com, listen to Micheal Savage and Thayrone on the radio to balance out the major networks' nightly news broadcasts. It takes effort and judgment and a discerning ear to sort through the bias leaning to both sides. And, sadly, there's no guarantee that you'll actually discover the truth.

I'm off to pack. Go read Orson Scott Card's article. It's also available here.

Senator Government

Now that I've opened this can of worms I might as well keep going.

My favorite part of the entire presidential debate last night was when McCain slipped up and called Obama "Senator Government". Ahh, here we have the biggest difference between the candidates.

Senator Government, true to the ways of a far left Democrat (is there actually a difference between a far left Democrat and a Socialist? really, not so much), wants bigger government, more programs, more mandates, more taxes. "Big Daddy government will come take care of you, just give us all your money and play by our rules. Oh, you don't have any money? That's ok. No, no, don't get off the couch, we'll just go get money from your hardworking neighbor to pay your bills."

As a moderate Republican, McCain is planning to cut taxes across the board, shrink government, and reduce pork barrel expenditures. Ahh, just the mere thought of a smaller federal government warms my little libertarian leaning heart. I thought I was falling in love with the old man when he called himself a federalist (he's using the contemporary "New Federalism" meaning of the word here which is actually anti-federalism -- It's a Bush thing. Bush. words. stumble. You get it.) and discussed giving more power and autonomy to the state governments. Boy, that's just too good to be true.

I was pretty upset, however, when both candidates started talking about bailing homeowners out of bad mortgages. And who's money do you plan to use to do that, gentlemen? Mine? I sure as heck hope not! I didn't take on a loan I can't afford. Foreclose that house and let the bank sell it to someone that can afford it. Or let the local community buy it and turn it into a park or a community garden. I heard a brief snippet of something on NPR the other day about people doing just that in Flint, MI. Wow, what a great idea. Keep it local, though. I do not want to see federal government involved in this! Property values in Flint plummeted long before the rest of the country started to feel this downturn. Auto companies had shut down plants and people had left and there were too many houses and no buyers. This community project reduces the supply of properties on the market -- basic supply and demand economics; and it intrinsically increases the value of the homes in the neighborhood -- more green space tends to do that. It's a win-win so long as your not picking the pockets of folks that live hundreds of miles away to make it happen.

Back to the big government thing here. Even if you don't believe that Obama's very very scary past has any relevance, how can you buy into his idea of an ever expanding government? Big government needs big money and that means big taxes. Obama may be talking about cutting taxes now, but he's going to find his scalpel isn't sharp enough to keep all the programs he wants, add more programs, AND reduce the budget. It's a logical impossibility. Bigger government ALWAYS means higher taxes.

If you really honestly think you want Big Government, take a really close look at some place that already has it. Really check it out first because once you start nationalizing it's nearly impossible to reverse course. Let's use a fairly benign example like France. France has big government and I'll readily admit, big government yields mighty fine wine. However, I would never want to actually become a French citizen. In France it's extremely difficult to get a job. Why? Because France has a slew of "labor friendly" laws preventing people from getting fired even due to poor performance... even when small reduction in force would prevent an entire company from collapsing. Employers are honestly afraid to hire folks because it's so difficult to fire them if things don't work out. Oh, and enjoy all the labor strikes. Get to know the entire Metro map well because at any given time one of the lines will be shutdown due to a strike. If you by chance own a vineyard, you will grow what the government tells you to grow. It matters not if the entire world has decided to stop drinking Chardonnay, the government mandates you grow those grapes anyhow because that's what grows best in your climate and soil. Good for wine, not so good, perhaps, for your bottom line. And if you get sick, I mean really sick, good luck. A nationalized health care system can't afford the state of the art equipment or the specialists that might be able to save you. Better find a way to get to the US where we still have semi free market medicine... unless you vote in Obama, then I think you just might be screwed.

Seriously folks, do you really want Big Daddy Government to take care of you? Or do you want a chance at the American Dream, earning a good living through hard work and smart choices, unfettered by overwhelming taxes and government mandates? Do you deserve to keep your own money spending any excess as you see fit to help out those you believe deserve your help? Or do you want the government to redistribute your hard earned wealth as they see fit, through an expensive bureaucracy and on to programs that you may or may not wish to support?

It's up to you. Vote with your brain, folks.

On no! Politics!

oh dear... I can't hold it in any longer. I try to avoid talking politics in public because I have a lot of friends on both sides and about half of them might not like me anymore after reading this.

In general I don't like radicalism. The far religious right with their creationism in public schools, anti-abortion, anti-queer, anti-science outlook incites the same level of rage in me as the far left that think it's the government's job to ensure the same level of comfort and luxury to everyone no matter how hard they work or how valuable their skills. The far right wants to legislate morality, the far left wants to use my hard earned money to pay someone else's bills.

Barack Obama is about as far left as left gets. John McCain is a moderate Republican. Can you see where I'm going here? Is it clear who I'm planning to vote for?

Here's why I fear Obama:
- Health care: Obama has said outright that he believes that health care is a RIGHT. Health care is NOT a right. It is a service provided by highly trained and highly skilled individuals that deserve to be well compensated for their work. You may not agree with me here but nationalizing health care will shred our world class medical system.
- Ayers: Obama says he was only 8 yrs old when Bill Ayers was blowing things up. Obama says he was just a neighbor. But Ayers hosted the party when Obama launched his political career. Obama and Ayers worked together on an education project in Chicago. Ayers is a radical leftist with a history of violence and even if they aren't buddies, he and Obama are definitely running in the same circles. And the "I didn't know" defense doesn't work here either. As a politician you really should know who you're associating with.
- Rev. Jeremiah Wright: Obama's own pastor, his teacher in spiritual and moral matters, is a scary scary man. He preaches anti-Americanism and spews hatred from the pulpit. I really don't understand how Obama weaseled away from this one. Even the media, so clearly in love with Obama, thinks that Wright is wrong. How can everyone simply shrug this off?
- Acorn: Obama was their lawyer. Maybe it's not a huge conspiracy. Maybe the folks that run Acorn are just too stupid to teach their canvassers that registering false voters is against the law. And that's not the only scary thing Acorn has done. They also strong armed banks into giving home loans to low income folks, most of whom couldn't actually afford to make the payments. Now the entire world economy is suffering in part because of such loans.
- Citizenship controversy: Phillip J. Berg, a lawyer and a Democrat, has filed a lawsuit against Obama asking Obama to produce proof that he's a natural born US citizen (a constitutional requirement for the presidency). Obama has yet to produce more than a short form copy of his birth certificate and the short form will not hold up in a court of law. Obama was apparently born in Hawaii (though his grandmother claims to have been present at his birth in Kenya). Even if he was born in the US, there's evidence that he had forsaken his US citizenship so he could attend school when he lived with hist stepfather in Indonesia. In order to attend school in Indonesia at that time you had to be a citizen of Indonesia and neither Indonesia nor the US allow for dual citizenship. His school paperwork claimed he was a citizen of Indonesia. That would mean he returned to the US through immigration and is now a naturalized citizen (NOT a natural born citizen) or an illegal alien. Berg's website all about the lawsuit is here. Maybe it's all a big conspiracy theory. If it is, why in the world won't Obama just get a legal copy of his birth certificate and render the whole thing moot?!?

Obama has me shaking in my boots. He associates with some people and organizations that are downright frightening. Buster noted something rather astonishing while we watched Obama on TV the other day. Obama delivers eloquent oratory. He has the ability to inspire an audience and make people want to agree with him and believe in him no matter what he's saying. Buster said it reminded him of Hitler. I was initially shocked by the comparison but I had to agree. Obama's charisma has carried him past the controversy with Wright and it seems to be floating him by Ayers and Acorn as well.

Now, I believe people can change over time. Once upon a time I was a practicing Lutheran. Later, in college, I became an atheist Objectivist Libertarian. Now I'm an agnostic independent. But I do find that my past informs my present. I still have libertarian leanings and I still rely on a personal moral code taught to me by my parents and reinforced by my childhood church.

Obama is trying to sweep his past under a rug. He's trying to tell us all that Ayers and Acorn and Write are all "distractions". Perhaps. But perhaps his past informs his present. How could it not? At the very beginning of his political career he associated with a man so far to the political left that he was willing to bomb buildings and homes to make his point. Obama was a lawyer for a far left organization with a sketchy past and fraudulent present. And Sunday after Sunday Obama sat in a pew and listened to his spiritual leader preach anti-American sentiment, hatred, and reverse racism. And he seems reluctant to produce documentation to prove that he's constitutionally eligible to hold the office of president. Could that mean he's willing to bypass the constitution to get what he wants? How can all this be irrelevant?

Here's what I really think: Obama is so far to the left of left that you might as well call him a radical socialist. And that, all by itself, is enough to make me run screaming.

McCain is not perfect. I don't agree with his stance on abortion but I know he can't really do anything about it so I figure that one is a non-issue. What I know of his health care plan sounds sketchy if not worthless, but at least he's not trying to socialize medicine. He's getting up there in age, and he's chosen a VP without a whole lot of experience. But I think I can trust him to choose good advisers and I believe that Palin would maintain those advisers if she had to take over the presidency.

I do like McCain's plan for Iraq. And I do believe that even though McCain helped to write the economic bailout plan that eventually passed congress, he would work to restore free market banking.

Most importantly I believe in McCain's integrity. And that, more than anything else, is why I'm going to vote for him.

a little news

I wish I could tell you that I've had nothing of any interest to write about and that's why it's been so gosh darn quiet around here. Truth is I've had plenty to write about, I've just been lazy! So, here are the two biggest events of the last month:

Baby K:
Baby K was born while I was away on dalmac. He's absolutely the cutest little guy I've ever seen, but so far I've only seen pictures! I've been so busy over the last month that I haven't had a chance to see him in person. I'm planning to fix that this evening. Sadly I'm still a few days away from finishing the little present I'm making for him. I'll have to mail it... or just drive over to see him again soon. Pictures of both the baby and the present are forthcoming.

Our anniversary present:
The traditional second anniversary gift is cotton and the modern gift is china. We shrugged all that off and bought a house instead. This is actually something we've been working on for about a year now. We finally have a signed sales agreement and we just need to do the inspection. Looks like we'll be moving in about a month. The new house is in a very nice area just outside of Saline. It's bigger and better laid out than our current house and it has a much bigger yard. It also has an extra garage for Buster's toys and a much larger space inside for my office and Buster's fly tying.

Once we move, we're going to replace the carpet in our old house and put it on the market. We know that buying another house before we sell this one is a risky move. But it's a calculated risk. We have a very old kitty that is prone to accidents and as long as that cat is in the house I know we'll have a terrible time selling. Also, we're prepared to sell below market price for our area so we should be able to sell quickly. Hopefully the recent economic upheaval won't screw us up too badly.

Two Years

Happy Anniversary to us! Buster and I got married 2 years ago today.

The wedding was in Delhi park. It was a gorgeous day. That picture was taken on the same bridge I talked about in this post.

After the wedding we moved on to the Michigan Firehouse Museum in Ypsilanti for the reception. What a fun place for a party!

A few days later we headed off for our honeymoon. We arrived in Thailand about 24 hours after the 2006 coup d'etat.

We spent a week on Phuket Island relaxing and wishing there was more sunshine. Then we spent a few days here:

That might very well be the coolest place I've ever been.

Anyhow, after two years of marriage I really don't have anything sage to say. I love my husband as much today as I did when I married him.

my dalmac stats

Thought I'd share a few stats from Dalmac for you:


Day 1, Lansing to Mt Pleasant:

• miles: 82.53
• time: 5:58 (does not include stops)
  
• average: 13.8 mph

Day 2, Mt Pleasant to McBain:

• miles: 68.5
• time: 4:45
• average: 14.42

Day 3, McBain to Elk Rapids:

• miles: 61.45
• time: 4:16
• average: 14.4 mph

Day 4, Elk Rapids to Petoskey:

• miles: 75.0
• time: 5:52
• average: 12.8 mph

Day 5, Petoskey to Mackinaw City:

• miles: 52.0
• time: 3:58
• average: 13.1 mph

Total, Lansing to Mackinaw City:

• miles: 339.48
• time: 24:49
• average: 13.7 mph

Other stats:

• max: 42 mph
• miles sagged: 0
• calories burned: over 20,000 (hrm reported just under this but wasn't always working quite right)
• damage sustained: broke my cadence meter when couldn't get clipped back in climbing the wall.
• sleep: Not nearly enough!
  
• beer consumed: plenty! (lost count by day 2)
• hangovers: none (shocking! and no, guys, please don't consider this a challenge for next time)
  
• debts incurred: One diet coke to the girl I nearly ran off the road when Ken snuck up on me in the hills on Day 3.
• gambling losses: $3.25 playing bottle pool (aka, pea pool)
• for next time: bring bigger duffel bags, bring an air mattress (the ground is really hard!), don't bother to bring the knitting or the novel (no time for that!), don't bother to bring a lawn chair, make time for a massage, learn how to manage the tent so it doesn't get so wet from dew, stretch more before getting in the car to go home, don't try to challenge to an ex track star no matter how little he rides these days - he will kick your ass.
  

My first dalmac will not be my last

I returned late last night from my very first dalmac. Dalmac is a 340 mile, 5 day bike ride from Lansing to Mackinaw City. I rode with my friend-in-law, Ken and his family. Ken and Buster have been super close friends since they were little kids. When I married Buster, Ken was just as much a part of the deal as Buster's parents and siblings. Luckily, Ken is one of those genuinely good people that you can't help but like. He and his dad and his uncles and cousins made me feel very welcome on this trip. I barely even noticed that I was the only girl in the group. By the end of the first day we were all laughing and trading barbs and having a fantastic time.

Here we are in Lansing about to get on our bikes for the 81.5 mile ride to Mt Pleasant.

Ken is the tall guy in the middle and that's me in the red and white jersey standing next to him. The guy on Ken's other side in the yellow is one of Ken's cousins and peeking over his shoulder is Ken's dad. Those two are a royal pain in the tush. The gentlemen on the far right and left are Ken's uncle and his uncle's friend. They were a joy to ride with.

Here's a stop in Lake George where we ate lunch and relaxed for a bit on the second day.
Day 2 took us 67.8 miles from Mt Pleasant to McBain. There were a ton of people on this ride. It seemed there were always other dalmac riders in view ahead or behind us, despite our late starts and long stops every day.

Here's some of our group on the road on day two.
That's Ken's uncle in front. See all the little banners below the orange dalmac flag? Every year you ride dalmac they give you another banner. He's ridden a LOT of dalmacs. So has Ken and most of the guys I was riding with.

When we reached McBain we grabbed our things from the baggage truck, hopped in Ken's van, and went to spend the night with Ken's aunt and uncle in Cadillac. They're super nice folks and they have a really beautiful house. They fed us a wonderful dinner and a fantastic breakfast the next morning and we all had a really nice time. Most of the boys slept on pull out couches and air mattresses. I got the guest bed and my own room. After hardly getting any sleep on the hard ground the night before, that bed was a little slice of heaven! I felt like a million bucks in the morning and I was more than ready for the 61.3 miles from McBain to Elk Rapids.

Day 3 was a great ride. The weather was perfect and the terrain was getting a little more hilly and scenic. I rode out ahead of the group for a while enjoying the rolling hills. On the third or fourth leg I was riding with Ken and his cousins. We cut loose a little and raced and chased each other through the hills. I had no trouble getting out ahead on the downhills, flats, and low grade climbs. But they all left me in the dust on the steeper climbs.

We pulled into Elk Rapids tired and happy. We gathered our things from the baggage truck, set up camp, and headed strait down for a dip in Elk Lake.
The water was a little chilly but it felt great anyhow.

Day 4 was the Day Of Pain. At 75.4 miles, the ride from Elk Rapids to Petoskey was the second longest day. It was also the hilliest day. 50 miles into the day we reached a low grade climb that went on and on. After about 2 miles of gentle climbing we came to a sign reporting a steep grade ahead. We turned a corner and arrived at The Wall. The Wall is an impossibly steep section of road. It's probably no more than a third of a mile long but it seems to head strait up. Walking up feels like climbing stairs. You really can't see how steep it is in the pictures.

Here's Ken's cousins climbing the wall. Look at that bum in the front showing off waving to the camera. He used to be a track star. I think that might be an unfair advantage here.

Here's Ken's cousin's friend climbing the wall. He rode that mountain bike the whole way. That guy's just plain strong. And determined.
Here's Ken climbing the wall. Ken did next to no training before this ride. With tactics, stubbornness, and raw strength he made it up the wall.

I'm a pretty strong rider and I trained quite a bit for this ride. But I couldn't get up the wall. I just wasn't strong enough.
I got within about 75 yards of the top before I simply couldn't turn over the pedals again. I stopped about 10 feet below where you see me standing. Next time I'll make it. It's one heck of a challenge!

When we reached Petoskey that evening I was more than ready to get off my bicycle. I could have used a nice long lukewarm shower. Instead, the showers were screwed up and the water was scalding hot. I ended up taking a sponge bath and washing my hair in the sink. I was tired and achy and crabby and I almost stayed behind when the guys went into town. As it turns out, sitting on the pier with a cold beer watching the sunset over Little Traverse Bay was the perfect balm for all my ills.

I couldn't help feeling a little sentimental and ended up with a couple great father-son photos.



The next day was the last. We had only 52.2 miles to ride from Petoskey to Mackinaw City. We slept in a little and took it easy, stopping several times and staying fairly close together for most of the ride. I ate ice cream and drank beer and enjoyed the scenery and the company.

Here we are a little more than half way through the day's ride at Leg's Inn in Cross Village overlooking Lake Michigan.
It was really a pretty day. We all took our time. I imagine everyone else felt the way I did. I was worn out and sore and glad the ride was coming to an end. At the same time I was sad that it was nearly over.

We arrived at Mackinaw City High School, our final destination, around 3:30pm. That must have been the slowest 52 miles I've ever ridden!
We tossed our gear in the van and strapped our bikes on top of The Chateau. We cleaned up a little and changed our clothes and hit the road.

Before turning south we made a quick stop for fudge and taffy and souvenirs near the Mackinac bridge where I snapped a picture.

It was a wonderful trip. I rode every mile of the route (except that little bit of the wall -- and I'll conquer that next time!) and had loads of fun hanging out with Ken and his family. I'm grateful to Ken for inviting me along. I couldn't possibly have fallen in with a more fun or friendly group. This will definitely not be my last dalmac. And I sure hope Ken and his family keep riding because I plan to crash their dalmac family vacations as often as I possibly can.

A challenging few days

Please excuse all the little tangents in this post. I thought about editing them out and decided to leave them so you can better see how busy and scattered I've been.

I'm heading out for DALMAC before the sun rises Wedenesday morning. This trip is unlike any other travel I've done before. Not only will I be biking long miles for five days strait (Lansing to Mt Pleasant to McBain to Elk Rapids to Petoskey to Mackinaw City), I'll also be camping. I've been camping with Buster a few times, but never a progressive camp where you have to tear down, move to a new location, and set up again each day. And I've done only one other multi-day bike trip. That was two days riding in California's Russian River Valley with a really wonderful friend that I don't see nearly enough of. She was a bridesmaid at my wedding and that trip was a bit of a bachelorette party with a touch less drinking and a lot more exercise than normally called for at such events.

That's us at Hop Kiln. We stayed in a great little Inn and had a wonderful time. But back to the point. A multi-day bike trip combined with camping is a new experience for me.

I'm a little bit of a nervous traveler. I spend days before any trip thinking about what I need to pack and gathering things and making sure things at home are taken care of and generally preparing. I'm even worse when it's some new kind of trip. So, I'm very very excited about DALMAC and I've been stressing myself out a little trying to get my things together and get ready to be gone from home and work for a week. I've also been trying to ride my bicycle as much as possible. So I've had a pretty packed schedule for the last couple weeks.

In the midst of my DALMAC preparation, I've had some fun family things to do. My challenging few days started out with some family friends in Bloomfield. They have a very nice house with a beautiful swimming pool and they invited us and the K's for a mid-week BBQ and pool party. BK was in town from San Francisco with her adorable daughter. I don't see them nearly often enough and BK is the big sister I never had. So I took half the day off to go play with my family.

I had a really nice time swimming with the girls and talking with BK and everyone else. I wish I would have stayed for the whole thing!

I left the party a bit early so I could meet up with the aabts in Plymouth for a ride on Hines Drive. As I was pulling out of the the neighborhood, one of these:


driving one of these:


was stopped at the stop sign in front of me trying to make a left hand turn in rush hour traffic. It was taking an awful long time for traffic to clear and he got frustrated. So he threw the giant SUV in reverse and backed strait into my poor little Ford Escort without a single glance in the rearview. (ok, the driver was a little older than the one depicted above, but not much.) We were on a residential street and I keep wondering, what if it wasn't my little escort, but somebody's dog, or worse yet, a child that he blindly backed into? It makes me a a little sick. And frankly, I must be getting old because it also makes me question the wisdom of allowing 16-yr-olds to operate dangerous machines.

In any case, now I have to deal with this:


That looks minor, but it's nearly $1500 in body damage to bumper and hood. On top of that, the car now sounds like someone tore the muffler off. My trustworthy mechanic (I know that sounds like an oxymoron, but Fox Auto on Dexter Rd in Ann Arbor is fantastic) took one listen and told me it's most likely a cracked exhaust manifold. Indeed, much to my surprise, some parts of the exhaust system are right there up front and they're brittle. He told me the accident almost certainly caused the damage.

The poor kid driving the SUV was quaking in his boots and near tears at the thought of giving me his insurance information or filing a police report. So I got his name and phone number and gave him mine and told him to have his parents call me the next day. (This is me being too darn trusting... Live and learn.)

By the time I arrived in Plymouth for my bike ride I was too late to ride with the club, but all was not lost. My friend Courtney was also a bit late so we had a nice ride together on Hines drive.

To add to the annoyances, before the family party I'd gotten a call from my sister-in-law, Sarah. She's married to Buster's brother so we also share the same last name. UofM health labs sent my blood test results to her. While I like and trust my sister-in-law, I'm a rather upset that the lab is not more careful to avoid a breach of privacy like this. I plan to call and complain and ask them to be more careful in the future. If they do it again, I'm thinking I might be calling a lawyer. (fyi, blood tests all came back normal and healthy. That's the good news. The bad news is I still don't know why I'm having such a miserably difficult time losing weight.)

I got up Friday morning and went strait to Dusty's Collision to get an estimate to fix the damage to my car. Then I went to my sister-in-law's office to pick up my lab results. Here's where she works:


That's the Deke Shant. It's owned by the fraternity Delta Kappa Epsilon, and houses their national offices. Sarah works for the national office. She gave me a tour of the building. It's smaller than I thought, but still very impressive. I especially liked the stained glass windows on the upper floor. Unfortunately I didn't get pictures.

By the end of the work day Friday (clearly I didn't get much work done) I still hadn't heard from the SUV kid's parents. I googled the phone number he gave me to verify that he wasn't trying to pull a fast one. The results matched the name he gave me and also spit out the first names of his parents and their address. I love google. I called and left a polite message on their answering machine asking them to return my call. I'm naturally a bit too trusting but I was really getting suspicious at this point.

The car thing was definitely stressing me out so I needed my Friday evening bike ride and post ride beer more than ever. Sadly, not quite half way through the ride the storms and rain that were only 30% likely landed right on top of us. We got soaked. So the ride was a bust but dinner and beer with my bicycle friends at Casey's was just as fun as ever.

Saturday, with a list as long as my arm of things I wanted to get done and still no word from SUV kid, I was getting very very frustrated. I called the number the kid gave me again around 11:30am. The mother answered. I told her I wanted to come up to Bloomfield and file a police report and go through insurance to get my car fixed and I told her about Dusty's estimate and the cracked exhaust manifold. She told me she would call me back in 20 minutes when her husband had left. She didn't want him to find out. She called back at 12:30pm to tell me she'd changed her mind and wanted to wait for her husband to return because it was so much money. When the husband/father finally called around 2pm he had some outlandish plan to have my car taken to his buddy's body shop in another town to be fixed. I handed the phone to Buster.

Buster may not always be the most sensitive or romantic of husbands but he always knows when and how to stand up for me. And that's way more important to me than flowers and candle light. He flat out told that guy NO. We would either do the right thing and file a police report and go through insurance or he would give us the money to get the car fixed here in Ann Arbor.

Michigan is a no-fault state so my insurance pays to fix my car when I'm involved in a traffic accident no matter who's at fault. And there was no damage (that I could see) to his giant SUV. I'm sure his insurance would be made aware of the accident, but I doubt they'd change his premiums unless the kid was issued a ticket. And I don't think it's possible for the kid to get a ticket since we didn't call the police to the scene. I can't figure out why filing a police report and going through my insurance to fix my car was a problem for him.

I could only hear Buster's side of the conversation but they were definitely not coming to an agreement. Buster told him we'd be filing a police report the next day. When he hung up he asked me if I had time to go right away. I hopped in the car and headed for the Bloomfield township police department immediately.

I expected to get chewed out for not calling the police to the scene. I didn't. The officer that took my report was very nice. When he asked if I'd called the other party to have them to come in and file the report with me I told him about the conversation with the father and that I simply wasn't comfortable contacting them again (honestly, every Hummer I saw in Bloomfield made me a little nervous). The officer gathered all my information, gave me a complaint number and sent me on my way within just a few short minutes. He told me he was going to follow up with the other party immediately. I was relieved.

I ran home, showered and dressed, and headed for Monroe (in my noisy car) where some close family friends were renewing their vows. I missed the beginning of the ceremony but the end was lovely and the party was great fun. I'll post pictures when I get them.

I was confident that the stress and hectic running around of the last few days was over as I pulled into my drive near midnight last night. It was a pretty warm evening and I was looking forward to walking into my air conditioned house and changing out of my dress clothes and relaxing with Buster for a bit. Only, when I walked in the door, the house was way warmer than it should have been, it was only slightly cooler than outside. oh dear...

So, on top of my mis-routed medical information, my messed up car, nearly getting screwed by rich people driving large scary SUVs, missing one bike ride and getting soaking wet on another, our AC was broken. Waah!

I bought myself a new pair of these to make myself feel better:

Some girls buy Manolo Blahniks, I buy Sidis. Also, I found a new favorite bike shop.

I feel much better now.

One Hundred Miles

One hundred point six to be exact. It's a bit of a long way. It's even longer when you're on a bicycle.

I finally completed my first century of the summer this past Sunday (egads! it's almost fall! took me long enough!). I've done other centuries in years past but this is my first one that wasn't part of an organized tour with dedicated food and rest stops. This was an AABTS club ride called the Sleeker Senile (S)Century. Sleeker hosts this ride on third Sunday of each month. I regret not bringing my camera. The scenery was great, but there was a chance of rain and I was paranoid.

The ride began at 8am in Dexter. 8am and I are not the best of friends, but I made it and I was ready to ride. Sleeker handed out cue sheets (for those that might not know, a cue sheet is a list of cues or directions including the distance between turns and the total mileage at each turn). At the top of the cue sheet it said "Olivet Out n Back 130". 130? 130 miles? Oh Boy! Ok, that was not what I had in mind but wasn't really a problem, it's an out and back route so I could turn around at 50 miles instead of 65 and have my century without killing myself. Click through to see my route.

We pulled out of Dexter and within a few short miles I knew I wasn't going to be able to keep up with the pack -- "the pack" being three very fit guys. About the time we reached Chelsea (shy of 10 miles into the ride) the guys had disappeared into the distance and I was firmly on my own. The weather was lovely and I pedaled along, quite happy to be riding at my own pace and enjoying the day. There was a bit of a headwind but I didn't let it bother me -- I knew it'd be at my back helping me along when I turned back toward home.

Around 25 miles in I was in need of a restroom and some water bottle refills. Just as I began to think about ducking into the woods to take care of the restroom portion I came upon Waterloo Recreation Area. This is where hulluva ride stops for lunch. I pulled in to the campground for a quick rest and refill.

Back on the road and about 45 minutes later I came across an unmarked intersection. The mileage showing on my bike computer wasn't quite right to be the turn I was looking for, but a construction detour in Chelsea and my detour into Waterloo had me a fair amount ahead of the mileage on the cue sheet. Maybe I had miscalculated. I was in completely unfamiliar territory so I pulled out some old maps from helluva ride and tried to figure out if I was still on them. While I was trying to decide which way to go another cyclist pedaled up and asked if I needed help. Her name is Dawn and she rescued me.

Dawn took a look at the cue sheet, pointed me in the right direction and offered to tag along for a bit. So I rode and chatted with Dawn for the next hour or so. When we reached the border of Jackson County she turned back and headed for home. I rode on into Ingham County toward Onondaga.

Onondaga is a teeny tiny little rural town about a dozen miles south of Lansing. The cue sheet recommended stopping here for food, rest, and refills. There was a nice little gas station/convenience store with picnic tables outside. I had a little lunch and a lot of water and Gatorade and I visited with another group of cyclists stopping for a snack. They'll be on the same dalmac route that I'll be on next week. Perhaps I'll see them there.

The Onondaga stop was just shy of the half-way point if I wanted to make a full century. So I got back on my bike and pedaled on up the road until my bike computer read 50.5 miles. The extra half mile was just to be sure. Better that I arrive back in Dexter with 101 miles than 99 miles because really wanted that century and I knew when I got back within sight of my car I'd be all done no matter what the mileage.

I passed a working oil well on my way up the road... Thought that was kinda cool. I didn't know we had those in Michigan. I reached the border between Ingham and Eaton Counties just as my bike computer reached 50.5 miles. So I turned around and headed back without entering Eaton. Three counties is enough for one day. The way back seemed shorter, though I had less company. I never really realized how pretty Michigan is until I started biking. This ride covered some very nice territory. The roads were more familiar on the way back and a gentle wind was helping me along so I rode a little easier and took more time to look around and enjoy the scenery.

I stopped again at Waterloo and went down by the lake this time. There were lots of families playing in the water and sitting on the beach and eating ice cream and generally enjoying the lovely weather. I hadn't planned on staying longer than it took to fill my water bottles and empty my bladder. But, with 75 miles down, I was getting tired and needed a little stretch and a short rest.

The last 25 miles were the most familiar and seemed to fly by. I had thought I might stop in Chelsea, ten miles from my destination, but when I got there I still had a full bottle left and was anxious to finish up. So I soldiered on.

As I rode the last stretch into Dexter I glanced down at my bike computer and relieved to see I wouldn't need to add any extra laps around town to reach the century mark. I was sore and exhausted and it felt wonderful to get off the bike. I had a few aches and pains but nothing serious. It was nothing like the time when my hand went numb on a century a couple years ago and I couldn't open a jar for two months. Or the time when I got saddles sores so bad on another century that I rode the last 5 miles without touching my poor tush to the saddle and couldn't wear underwear for a week. Or the time when I arrived home so dehydrated that I had a headache for two days. Yes, I think I've finally got this century thing figured out. My knees didn't even hurt the next day!

Not five minutes after I arrived in Dexter, two of the fast guys pulled in. They had done a full 130 miles. They must have set a blistering pace and they both looked at least as exhausted as I felt.

In case you're wondering, my ride time for 100.6 miles was almost exactly 7 hours. That's an average of 14.3 mph. The whole ride, with rest stops, took 8 hours. The 130 mile guys probably spent a little less time resting and probably averaged between 17 and 18 mph. That, in my opinion, is WICKED fast for that long of a ride. Someday maybe I'll be that strong! In the mean time, I'm pretty proud of my 100.6 miles.

The 2008 Hugos, part II (response to comments)

Wow! I've apparently attracted some attention with my Hugo post. Check out the comments on the previous post.

First, Mary Robinette Kowel has bunches of free fiction online here. Also, catching up a little on her blog after posting my Hugo rundown, I see she just sold a story to Subterranean Press. I, too, love Subterranean Press. Their books are treasures, both because they tend to choose wonderful stories and because they print and bind them with top notch materials and include the most beautiful art work. A Sub Press book is a tactile and visual pleasure as well as a good read. I'm looking forward to reading both Mary's online work and her Sub Press work. (Wow, a Hugo winner commented on my blog! That is so cool!)

I also got a comment from Nadine. I'm not sure who she is, but it sounds like she either knows Michael Chabon professionally or she's a knowledgeable fan. She indirectly pointed out that my rant was a bit harsh. She's right. I'm not sore about Michael Chabon, in particular, publishing SF under a mainstream imprint. To be quite honest The Yiddish Policeman's Union caught my eye even before it landed on the Hugo nominations list. I haven't read it yet simply because I'm a somewhat slow reader (especially during bicycling season) and my to-be-read pile is taking over my house.

Here's the problem: I can't decide if it's in the best interest of the science-fiction/fantasy community to hand a Hugo to a book printed under a mainstream imprint. On the one hand, the Hugo is and always has been a genre award. Is it a good idea to award Hugos to books that aren't publicly considered SF when there's so much excellent SF out there? On the other hand, this sort of thing might attract new readers and writers to the genre. By poking our heads out in the mainstream world and saying "hey, that mainstream novel is actually SF and we really liked it," we might make the literary world aware that a great deal of SF is literary, relevant, well written, accessible, diverse, and worth reading.

Did we award a non-SF work an SF award? Or did we recognize an outstanding SF story wrapped in a mainstream package?

Nadine's comments about alternate history are worth addressing here also. Alternate history has been a popular SF element for quite some time. PK Dick's The Man in the High Castle comes instantly to mind and is probably the most classic strait up example. Mary Gentle's Book of Ash series includes some fantasy elements as well as alternate history. The Axis of Time series by John Birmingham is a recently popular SF alternate history of WWII. I haven't read any Harry Turtledove, but he's known for writing fantasy alternate histories. I've read a ton of Tim Powers. Much of his stuff is considered secret history which I would consider the fraternal twin to alternate history.

I'm not particularly well read when it comes to modern mainstream fiction. If alternate history actually is a fairly common mainstream element, I'm not aware of it. Also, if the alternate history element in The Yiddish Policeman's Union doesn't make it SF, what does? Because if there's no science fiction or fantasy elements, it may very well be an excellent novel, but it shouldn't have been eligible for a Hugo. I don't care how amazing a book is, I think we want to exercise some care about what we set out there as the best sci-fi/fantasy novel of a given year. Anyhow, I'd better go read it before I get myself into any more trouble here.

To be perfectly honest, most of the angst in my rant comes from my brief experience with McCarthy's The Road. You see, when The Road first hit the shelves I was told I must go read this book. "It's SF, you'll love it," I was told. Oprah had just endorsed the book. Oprah's endorsement tends to be the mark of the beast in my mind. I just plain don't like the same books Oprah likes. The novels she endorses tend to be chock full of loneliness, misery, and woe. The Road is no exception. I stood in the middle of the bookstore and popped that book open to the middle (as I often do when I want to sample the flavor of a book) and started reading. I barely got through two pages before realizing that if I didn't set it down right away I was going to send it flying into into the far wall of the store. If mainstream readers think this is a good example of sci-fi... oh sweet lord save us my genre is doomed.

Look, Oprah, if you want to read loneliness, misery, and woe, go ahead, read The Road. If you want to read a well written, literary, post apocalyptic novel go check the SF shelves for A Canticle for Leibowitz by Miller. That's my favorite of the many post apocalyptic novels I've read. The post apocalypse is a super popular old school SF theme. It's been done a zillion times. Don't go thinking The Road is something new and different, because as far as I can tell, it's a miserable example of a well worn theme. It just got stacked on a different shelf.

So my angst about The Road got mixed up with my mixed feelings and reservations about handing a Hugo to a main stream novel that is of unclear sf-ness.

Directly, I apologize for calling Chabon a jerk. That was totally out of line. I'm sorry. I'm sure he's a very nice person and I'm impressed to learn from Nadine that he's a member of the SFWA. Also I don't find any fault with his inability to attend WorldCon. I'm even fairly sure I'll like his book when I read it. While I remain skeptical, I promise to withhold final judgment regarding the book's Hugo worthiness until after I've read it. It's now firmly on my winter reading list and I plan to report back here.

2008 Hugo Awards

The 2008 Hugo results were announced last weekend. If you're not a Science Fiction fan or a follower of literary awards in general, then you probably have no idea what I'm talking about.

Science Fiction has two major awards, the Nebula and the Hugo. Nebula winners are chosen by the Science Fiction Writers Association (SFWA). The voters are professional writers so the winning works tend to be more literary and often more edgy or groundbreaking. The Hugo winners, on the other hand, are ostensibly chosen by the fans. The Hugo voting and awarding both happen every year at the World Science Fiction Convention. Attendees and anyone that wishes to pay for a supporting membership to the convention are permitted to cast a Hugo ballot.

Here's a rundown of this year's Hugo winners:

• Best Novel: The Yiddish Policemen’s Union by Michael Chabon (HarperCollins; Fourth Estate)
• Best Novella: “All Seated on the Ground” by Connie Willis (Asimov’s Dec. 2007; Subterranean Press)
• Best Novelette: “The Merchant and the Alchemist’s Gate” by Ted Chiang (Subterranean Press; F&SF Sept. 2007)
• Best Short Story: “Tideline” by Elizabeth Bear (Asimov’s June 2007)
• Best Related Book: Brave New Words: The Oxford Dictionary of Science Fiction by Jeff Prucher (Oxford University Press)
• Best Dramatic Presentation, Long Form: Stardust Written by Jane Goldman and Matthew Vaughn, Based on the novel by Neil Gaiman Illustrated by Charles Vess Directed by Matthew Vaughn (Paramount Pictures)
• Best Dramatic Presentation, Short Form: Doctor Who “Blink” Written by Steven Moffat Directed by Hettie Macdonald (BBC)
• Best Editor, Long Form: David G. Hartwell
• Best Editor, Short Form: Gordon Van Gelder
• Best Professional Artist: Stephan Martiniere
• Best Semiprozine: Locus
• Best Fanzine: File 770
• Best Fan Writer: John Scalzi
• Best Fan Artist: Brad Foster
• John W. Campbell Award for Best New Writer: Mary Robinette Kowal
  

Starting with the novella (I'll come back to the novel at the end):

Connie Willis is my all time favorite. I love her. If I ever met her I would go all gaga-fan-girl and drool on her shoes and beg her to sign everything I own including my arm. I own at least one copy of every novel she's ever published, including some of the early ones that are hard to find. She is brilliant and funny and engaging and witty and... you get the picture. I could go on and on. I won't. I will tell you "All Seated on the Ground" is good, but not my favorite of her works. I believe it's filler while she works on a rumored massive novel set during the blitz in London that we've all been waiting for forever now. She's been publishing these little novellas every year for the past several years. None of them are bad (we are talking about the goddess of humorous science fiction here, after all, she's not capable of "bad"). But even the best of her novellas can't touch her novels. I'm really craving that next novel. These little novellas are lovely and enjoyable but it's like a little nibble of a snack when what you really want is a four course meal. I want that blitz novel.


On to the Novelette:

I haven't read “The Merchant and the Alchemist’s Gate” but I've heard good things. I'll have to track it down. Answer me this, though: What the heck is a novelette? I understand that there's a word-count definition available here (SFWA says a work between 7,500 and 17,500 words) but that, in my opinion, is a silly way to categorize literary works.

The difference between a novel and a short story is clear in the structure. Generally a short story has a single major beat to the plot and no more than one or two developed characters. Often all the characters are simple sketches or stereotypes and none are actually developed. A short story usually contains a single major idea -- a theme that can be summed up in a single sentence.

A Novel generally has a plot line with several beats usually accompanied by subplots and tangents and played out by one or more well developed major characters, who grow and change (or pointedly don't) as a result of the plot. A novel can easily contain several complex themes.

If a short story is a single at bat, then a novel might be a whole season of play or even the entire life's story of the batter.

Given those definitions based on literary elements rather than word count, I'm satisfied with the concept of a novella as something in between. For example, "All Seated on the Ground" has a plot with several beats, but a single theme and only one somewhat well developed character (the narrator).

So, can someone please differentiate a novelette for me without using word count? If it can't be differentiated without word count, why the heck does it deserve it's own award category?


The Short Story:

Ahhhh! E. Bear. Prolific, brilliant, literary, challenging, wonderful Bear. I can plow through a Connie Willis novel in 2 or 3 days. A novel of the same word count written by Elizabeth Bear might take me a month. She's a challenge to read because her work is layer upon layer packed full of ideas and allusions and complex, fascinating, often abused, and usually broken characters. Bear expects her readers to be intelligent, attentive, and well read. And I love her for it even if some of her stuff does fly right over my head.

I read "Tideline" in Asimov's when it was first published last summer. I didn't actually like it the first time I read it. I re-read it a couple months ago and walked away with a completely different opinion. It's fantastic. For some odd reason, the second read made me think of "Puff the Magic Dragon". In any case, it's a good story. Go read it for yourself and tell me what you think.

Bear better make some space on her mantle for all the awards she's going to win over the next few years. The woman is talented. And prolific, did I mention prolific?


The rest. Gonna skip a few categories here and just briefly comment on others:

Drama, Long form: Stardust by Neil Gaiman is a fantastically amazing brilliant and wonderful book. It's a fairytale in the spirit of the brothers Grimm -- dark and chilling and magical and heartwarming all at the same time. The movie was... eh.. pretty good. It sort of rounded off the edges, and the edges were the best part. But we're grading on a curve here and I suppose Stardust the movie was slightly better than the Golden Compass movie (also a far far better book than movie), and the rest of the nominees weren't even in the same league. So there you have it. Ok movie, worth renting. If you're a reader, go read the book instead.

Drama, Short form: Umm... I have a confession. I really don't get the fascination with Dr Who. I've tried watching it, I just can't get into it. Maybe, in the shadow of Farscape and Firefly (best SF TV shows EVER!) I'm expecting too much from my SF TV?

Locus, semiprozine? Locus pretty much is the journal of the professional SF world, so far as I know. Also, no fiction in Locus. huh. I guess I don't grok that category. ("grok": That word would likely be found in the Oxford Dictionary of Science Fiction, winner of best related book Hugo, which I just added to my amazon wishlist.)

Hey! Scalzi got a Hugo! For best fan writer? Umm.. hey guys? News flash: Scalzi is a professional published author and his blog, The Whatever, while wildly popular and quite fun to read, is a promotional tool. Shouldn't best fan writer go to someone writing fan-fic? Oh well, Scalzi deserves a Hugo. And this one will have to do until we hand him one for best novel or the Hugo folks add a category for best SF blog/podcast. Which, really, they should do right away because blogs and podcasts are contributing to the SF genre in a major way these days.

Best new writer, Mary Robinette Kowal... umm... where's the work? 'cause really I wanna read it and I can't find it. I've read and very much enjoyed her blog. I've listened to her read a few different stories and fell head over heels in love with her voice. Seriously, she could read the telephone book out loud and I'd enjoy listening. She's very active in the SF community but I honestly can't find her stories and I really want to read them.

Ok, going back to best novel:

I apologize in advance for my rant. I'm just a wee bit miffed about this one. Why? Oh why? Why in the world? Why on god's green earth would SF fans vote for some jerk that won't even allow his work to be filed in the SF section of the bookstore? I don't care how good his novel is, I'm quite hesitant to put my hard earned book money into the hands of some fool that writes SF but is too darn good to admit he's an SF author. What is wrong with you people? You're promoting this author/publisher/agent that thinks you're just a bunch of useless geeks with no literary taste!

All right, all right. Maybe Chabon himself doesn't think he's too good for SF-fandom but his publisher and his agent must. And that's just as bad. The Audrey Niffeneggers (Time Traveler's Wife), the Cormac McCarthys (that post-apocalyptic rip-off dung-heap called The Road), and the Micheal Chabon's of the world can all go piss up a flagpole. They want to use the tools of SF (time travel, post-apocalypse, alternate history) without being directly compared to other writers in the genre. They don't want to be considered genre authors. By denying that their work is SF they further and promote the idea that SF cannot be literary or relevant, that it does not speak about values and concepts and the ways in which we choose to live our lives.

I have news for you fools that think you're too good for the SF shelves.

You are too good to sit alongside Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury, a book that shows us the dangers of mass media and the cautions us not to shut out concepts and ideas that diverge from the popular.

Your novels too important to rub shoulders with Orwell's 1984, or Huxley's Brave New World, or Zamyatin's We. Distopias all, without which we would not have the concepts or a healthy fear of Big Brother, groupthink, or soma.

And don't forget Asimov's Foundation about fate and free will. Or Le Guin's Left Hand of Darkness about gender politics.

How 'bout Frank Herbert's Dune? Among it's other epic themes, it's about winning the hearts and minds of a religious desert people who control a vital economic resource -- that couldn't possibly be relevant today!

Then there's Elizabeth Moon's The Speed of Dark about an autistic man. This book raises critical moral and ethical questions about our advancing medical skills and technology.

Oh, and you certainly wouldn't want your work to be seen near Peter Watts's Blindsight, a deeply chilling and utterly brilliant novel about the nature and utility of self consciousness.

Your novel is literature and these are science fiction, and never the two shall meet! I wonder, Michael Chabon and Harper Collins, will you stamp "Hugo award Winner" on the next printing of this book? Or "by the Hugo award winning author" on your next release? Will you now embrace SF, after initially shunning it, now that the SF community has recognized you as one of our own and embraced you? Maybe, just maybe, you'll discover that we're not all geeky Star Trek obsessed adolescent boys.

Will I eventually read The Yiddish Policeman's Union? Yes, most likely I will. I've made a point in the last several years of reading all the past Hugo award winners and reading many of the past nominees. And, there's a flip side to my rant here... Perhaps by recognizing a main stream novel with a major SF award we will make the non-SF reading community aware that SF can be, and often is literary and well worth reading. Maybe a few literary snobs out there read this book before we handed it a Hugo and will now think "Hey, I read that, I liked it. It's SF? huh. Maybe there's other SF out there worth reading." And that would be a victory for SF.

So maybe there's a silver lining, but I'm still grouchy about all these folks that write SF but are squeamish about being labeled as SF writers.

There you have it, the 2008 Hugos and my opinions.. and my rants . Check out the Denvention Hugo nomination page to see a list of all this year's nominees. Most of the shorter works are available online, linked from that Denvention page. And if you prefer to give them a listen, escape pod podcasted four of the five short story nominees including Bear's "Tideline".

If this post bored you to tears, I promise there's more biking content coming soon, and probably other stuff too... and if you enjoyed this, well, there's more SF commentary in the works as well. I'm gonna try to shorten things up around here and post a little more often. I don't make any promises, though.